TED英语演讲：学会拥抱别人
你会拥抱别人吗?拥抱别人就是拥抱自己，就是给自己温暖。Newton女士讲述了作为一个演员演绎很多永远不同自我的角色的经历，这些经历让她变得温暖而有智慧。下面是本文库为大家收集关于TED英语演讲：学会拥抱别人，欢迎借鉴参考。
学会拥抱别人，就是给自己温暖 演讲者：Thandie Newton
Embracing otherness. When I first heard this theme, I thought, well, embracing otherness is embracing myself. And the journey to that place of understanding and acceptance has been an interesting one for me, and it’s given me an insight into the whole notion of self, which I think is worth sharing with you today.
拥抱他人，当我第一次听到这个主题时我觉得拥抱他人，就是拥抱我自己。对于我来说通往理解和接纳的路是十分有意思的，并且让我对＂自我＂这一概念有了深刻的理解 。我想这值得在今天和你们分享。
We each have a self, but I don’t think that we’re born with one. You know how newborn babies believe they’re part of everything; they’re not separate? Well that fundamental sense of oneness is lost on us very quickly. It’s like that initial stage is over -- oneness: infancy, unformed, primitive. It’s no longer valid or real. What is real is separateness, and at some point in early babyhood, the idea of self starts to form.
我们都有一个自我但我并不认为这是与生俱来的。你看那些刚出生的小婴儿，他们认为自己属于任何事物，他们并不是脱离的。这种最基本的同一性，会很快从我们身上消失，如同最初始的状态已经结束。同一性：婴儿期 未成形的、原始的将不复存在 ，取而代之的是分离。在婴儿期的某一点，关于自我的意识开始萌芽。
Our little portion of oneness is given a name, is told all kinds of things about itself, and these details, opinions and ideas become facts,
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which go towards building ourselves, our identity. And that self becomes the vehicle for navigating our social world. But the self is a projection based on other people’s projections. Is it who we really are? Or who we really want to be, or should be?
我们同一性的一小部分被赋予了一个名字 被告知关于它自己的任何事情 这些细节，观点和想法变成事实，这些都帮我们形成自我以及自己的身份。然后这个自我就成为一个工具，用来探索周围的这个世界，但是这个自我实际上是一个投影。以其他人的投影为基础 这就是真正的我们吗?是我们真正想成为，或者应该成为的人吗?
So this whole interaction with self and identity was a very difficult one for me growing up. The self that I attempted to take out into the world was rejected over and over again. And my panic at not having a self that fit, and the confusion that came from my self being rejected, created anxiety, shame and hopelessness, which kind of defined me for a long time. 在我成长过程中我一直都很难处理自我与身份之间的相互影响，那个我尝试着向周围的世界展示的自我，被一次又一次拒绝，因为没有一个合适的自我而带来的恐慌，以及因为被拒绝而产生的惶恐，引起了我的焦虑、羞愧还有无望。这些在很长一段时间里都限制了我。
But in retrospect, the destruction of my self was so repetitive that I started to see a pattern. The self changed, got affected, broken, destroyed, but another one would evolve -- sometimes stronger, sometimes hateful, sometimes not wanting to be there at all. The self was not constant. And how many times would my self have to die before I realized that it was never alive in the first place?
但当我回想过去对于自我的毁灭反复出现，我开始看出一些规律，一个自我被改变被影响、被打击破坏，但有一个新的会形成。有时更强、有时充满仇恨 、有时则根本不想出现，这个自我并不是恒定的。在我还没有意识到这个自我曾经从未存在时，我的＂自我＂ 会死多少次呢?
I grew up on the coast of England in the ‘70s. My dad is white from
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Cornwall, and my mom is black from Zimbabwe. Even the idea of us as a family was challenging to most people. But nature had its wicked way, and brown babies were born. But from about the age of five, I was aware that I didn’t fit. I was the black atheist kid in the all-white Catholic school run by nuns.
我于上世纪七十年代生长在英格兰的海岸边，我父亲是来自康沃尔的白人，我母亲是来自津巴布韦的黑人。对于许多人来说是无论如何也想不到我们是一家人，但大自然自有意想不到的一面，棕色的孩子出生了。但自从五岁开始我就察觉出我的格格不入。我是一个信奉无神论的黑人孩子，在一个由修女运转的白人天主学校我是一个另类。
I was an anomaly, and my self was rooting around for definition and trying to plug in. Because the self likes to fit, to see itself replicated, to belong. That confirms its existence and its importance. And it is important. It has an extremely important function. Without it, we literally can’t interface with others. We can’t hatch plans and climb that stairway of popularity, of success.
我的自我在不断寻找一个定义并试图将自己套入定义，因为自我都是愿意去融入 。看到自己被复制，有归属感那能确认自我的存在感和重要性，这很重要。这有一个极端重要的功能，没有一个对自我的定义，我们简直不能和其他人交流。我们无法制定计划、无法爬上潮流和成功的阶梯。
But my skin color wasn’t right. My hair wasn’t right. My history wasn’t right. My self became defined by otherness, which meant that, in that social world, I didn’t really exist. And I was “other” before being anything else -- even before being a girl. I was a noticeable nobody. 但我的肤色不对、我的发色不对、我的来历不对， 我的自我被他人定义。这意味着在社会上我并不存在，我首先被定义为一个另类，甚至先于被定义为一个女孩。我是一个引人注意的没有人。
Another world was opening up around this time: performance and dancing. That nagging dread of self-hood didn’t exist when I was dancing. I’d
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TED英语演讲：学会拥抱别人
